We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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