it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
