we made out on top of his cat.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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