Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
