We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize