marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
You can't just leave with hair like that
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
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