You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
