I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
