I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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