I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
