so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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