he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
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