She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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