I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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