I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Randomize