god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Randomize
