yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
