Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
