I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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