Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
