yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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