either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
