Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
