I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
