Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
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