The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
