I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
