How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
