Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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