nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
