This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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