oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I've blown a few things in my day
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
