Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Randomize
