omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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