best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Randomize
