Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
