hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
