put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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