Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Randomize
