When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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