Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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