i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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