shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
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