No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
