From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
