her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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