I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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