after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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