do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
