thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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